2 people were charged under the ISA for blogging racist remarks a couple of years ago. What about people who blog generally about others to put them down? Many times when i read __ 's blog, i was tempted to submit an entry in reply to __'s "heartfelt" feelings (more like bitter complains). I thought it was childish, so time and again I skipped it.
Talking about getting hurt, each time I read something like that, spare a thought about how I feel. I wonder if you'd really think youre always right, because sometimes I get scared by the thought that this is true. Are you the only one getting cut inside? Rhetorical question.
With God, I know I can love you if I give it my bestest shot at it, which requires lots of compromising and praying till drops of sweat falls like blood. With all my heart, I want the best outcome, though at times Ive failed to depend on the love of God. Sometimes I do believe I had the right to be angry, but I want to give up that right for His name's sake. I told you that I'll share with you, IF YOU ASK. but, you took/ate / used them WITHOUT MY PERMISSION, and so, you expect me to time and again give in to your invasion of my privacy? Instead of apologising, you said I'm breaking my promise? I've never agreed to lending you anything without you asking.I want to be able to shower that mercy and grace just like how God has given it to me so unconditionally.
I know it wont be instant. I know it would take time. How long? I wouldnt know. But, I'm gonna try. If I dont, how would I ever know what the result will be?
The biggest hurdle in my life.
How I so badly want the ability to jump across it, and move on to higher planes.
Why, i really wonder.
WhY?
As far as I've lived on the surface of this Earth, I've not come to know of another person in this situation.
It's kind of difficult, because I dont know who can I tell this to so openly; Someone who has conquered it. Someone who emphatizes. Someone who does not cast judgements. Someone who has a pure heart and faith in God. Because of this, many times I feel that I'm not good enough a disciple to be serving God. The feeling of inadequacy, and lack of God's Holiness stirs up thoughts of giving up and letting go. of everything.
But again to repeat, God doesnt hold a tick-list to mark off the 'bad christians'. His love is unconditional. His grace is more than sufficient. (We must not take it for granted). It's this tenderness of His, that cause me to want to move on, push on, and reach ahead..
Proverbs 25:15
15 By long forbearance a ruler is persuaded,
And a gentle tongue breaks a bone.
Psalms 4:3-4
Know that the LORD has set apart the godly for himself;
the LORD will hear when I call to him.
In your anger do not sin;
when you are on your beds,
search your hearts and be silent.
Selah
(10:50:00 PM)
